|
the 4 most popular myths of dating-at least a |
Hostdepartment
| IF YOU LIKE WHAT YOU SEE HERE, FEEL FREE TO CHECK OUT MY NEWEST RANT, "PEOPLE WHO SHOULD JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP", BY COPYING AND PASTING THE LINK BELOW:http://blog.the internet.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.view&blogID=368460070 The 4 most popular myths of dating... according to meWritten by an actual manWarning: I have used the following words in this blog: dick, bang,fuck,boink,screwed, shmuck, pussy,cock,shlong, tits, ass, blow job and asshole.Relax go with the flow ...The world has evolved from this place where people roamed naked and killed their neighbors with spears for the hell of it to this organized universe where we can instantly try out new things and explore and where we evolve on a technological scale as never before.And at the same time we can achieve meaningful things like challenge people across the globe to play in Dungeons and Dragons tournaments online.But what has not changed it that guys still have penises and women get excited when they see a man when he is naked, or he is wearing a nice suit, when he is rich and famous, or they heard that he has a 12 inch dick, or they desperately want to see a man naked for a variation of all three previous criteria.So largely because I?m in the mood to be a complete shmuck and partly because I like to talk out of my ass I decided to visit some myths of dating.1)She likes you for you:Back when I was 15 years old I liked a certain girl in high school.Let?s call her Debbie.I liked Debbie.I was not sure why.It was her smile and she had nice legs and tits and could make people laugh.She was kind of sluttish too but that was part of her charm.I once bought her a coke and tried to have a conversation that actually made senseLater in the week some senior who had a Porsche 911 was banging her.I could have oozed the personality of Johnnie Carson but that guy had a Porsche so he got her.Later on she had boyfriends who bought her things and one of those guys bought her a car during out senior year.He also used to beat her.And eventually they got married.It was only later on when I did not become totally nervous around women that I developed some sort of personality that I was able to start initiating conversations with girls without shaking in the same way as if I was just been waterboarded by the Cambodian police.Bottom line- She does not like you for you.She likes you for who you portray.2)"He is a jerk but I can change him"He is known as the guy who only calls his friends when he needs something from them and in the past has treated 95% of his previous girlfriends like shit.However some women look at a guy like this and say to themselves, " everyone says he is a shmuck, he treats everyone like an asshole but he will change for me since my mother and all my friends say that I?m a ?great catch?".He may change for a few months in order that you give it up regularly and so people can see that he is dating an actual person.But in no instance should you as a woman believe that you can make this douchebag your personal highway construction project where at 1st there may be improvements but in the end the road goes to the same place anyways. |
| But in no instance should you as a woman believe that you can make this douchebag your personal highway construction project where at 1st there may be improvements but in the end the road goes to the same place anyways.There is only so much pussy can change.Take a look at Michael Jackson, Donald Trump, Alec Baldwin, Daniel Baldwin, and Axel Rose.Somewhere down the line hot girls thought they could change these guys and were very wrong.3)Men are hornier than women:Bull shit.Have you taken a look around a bar on a Friday night?Women are wearing heels and walking uncomfortably, they have lipstick, and they have shaved their legs and their bush.Do you think that I think they do that because they had nothing to do and they just need to get out?No they want a man to penetrate them, understand them and boink them like they never have been boinked before while we men act like stupefied shits and pay the tab at the bar.Women who wear low cut dresses at nightclubs showing copious amounts of cleavage are basically saying "Are you a real man or what?I?m open for business, fucko.Will you be the bastard who steps up to the plate?"!!4)Men want to date a "respectable" girl:Don?t get me wrong.I love a "nice girl" who never got a parking ticket that I can take home to my relatives and say "this is my Mother Theresa".I don?t think Mother Theresa was giving guys blow jobs in high schoolI think I got sidetracked...(waits for Ritalin to kick in )Oh yea, but let?s put all that shit aside for a minute.We all love sluts and ho?s with the same equal fervor that we love "good girls" Otherwise why would people give a shit what Paris Hilton is doing or whose cock Lindsey Lohan is riding this week or which slut will get to ride the shlong of Brett Michaels on "Rock of Love"You give a 20 year old guy a choice whether he wants to date the freckled chick from the library or the girl who everyone knows gives it up at least once a week to some lucky bloke and he will chose the latter.Don?t blame us guys.Please!!We have penises,ok? These are hard choices we have to makeWe don?t mind girls who have been around the block; just not every blockAre you confused yet?"Cuts like a knife" by Bryan AdamsDisclaimer: If you are offended by any of this, realize that I am trying to make light of stuff that goes on between women and men.Not all of what I say here is complete truth.I am just trying to analyze some things in a way some how related to humor.Who knows, I may have no idea what I am talking about |
| I am just trying to analyze some things in a way some how related to humor.Who knows, I may have no idea what I am talking about |
|
|
Last Updated ( Thursday, 17 July 2008 )
|
